Tag: #compassion

Living Maya Time – Reflections on N’oj

The Solstice revealed some very old knots within my family. Many ugly things were said. It left me shell shocked and seeking support from both the heart of the sky and the heart of the earth. The wounds will take time to heal, but they will no longer be festering. With time and space reconciliation will arrive. I’m focusing on keeping my own head in my heart as I serve as mediator. I’m also beginning to understand that the job of parenting never ends. Even when your own children become parents themselves. In fact, it is a whole new opportunity to untangle the knots of the past and our ancestral lineage. These are the gifts that the Trecena of K’at offered me while I was in the mountains. Opportunity and compassion.

Since I moved onto my parents property three years ago, I have been praying for healing between myself and them and it’s happened. Now there is space for this same healing to happen between myself and my own children. It’s not comfortable and it’s most certainly exhausting, but it’s the most sacred work that we can do while we are here in earth school. The Maya believe that the fire is the ear of spirit and that’s why fire ceremonies are such an important part of their spiritual practices. I made my Wajxakib B’atz fire ceremony at 4500 feet, opposite Mt Lassen this cycle. My fire offered me an image of a portal and an invitation to enter it. I accepted and spoke the words that needed to be spoken.

N’oj arrived quietly after we had descended the mountain and returned home. Still bruised and vulnerable, I found myself unable to write as the first full trecena of the new calendar cycle opened. My spirit asked for stillness and reflection first. I often think about N’oj as the mind of the calendar. However, N’oj is not only the mind. It is also the earth thinking through us. In order to hear the wisdom of the earth we need to listen. I listen best when I am quiet and that’s why I’ve decided to offer a reflection at the end of each trecena this calendar cycle instead of at the beginning.

Tomorrow our loyal companion T’zi arrives to chaperone us into our destiny. T’zi brings the frequency of justice and natural law along with the playful and instinctual nature of the dog. I look forward to sharing my journey with T’zi after I’ve taken it.

In Stillness,

Cara xoxo

Cultivating Presence in the Chaos

Hello Friends,

It’s been a minute. How are you doing? Truthfully, I have not been doing so well this past month. I am struggling to stay present and grounded. It’s felt like I am in the spin cycle of my washing machine.

My Dad’s health has taken a turn for the worse. His cancer is back and he is on life support. We have said goodbye four times now. I am clinging to a life raft of hope, but my grief threatens to breach the surface each time there is a new update. I now understand how cruel this disease can be, how the suffering expands and diffuses from the victim into the family.

My grief manifested in my lower back. I woke up and I could barely move without excruciating pain. Spirit was sitting on me and was not going to let me up until I felt some of the feelings I had been repressing. The pain in my back invited me to cry, so I let it flow. I sobbed and I shook. I wailed and I screamed. I gave my grief, anger and frustration full license to express.

I felt a release, but my back was still out and I began to wonder how I was going to get up to use the bathroom. Life was still there, insisting that I participate even though I couldn’t move. Sometimes the only thing we can do is be where we are and have compassion for ourselves.

Sweet Surrender

For me that meant spending the entire weekend in bed watching Hallmark movies and eating cannabis edibles. I ignored my task master mind that told me I was being lazy and that I could surely find something productive to do while in bed and I SURRENDERED. And guess what? I woke up Monday morning with no back pain at all.

Sometimes what we need in order to cultivate presence in the face of chaos is to just have mercy on ourselves and allow ourselves to just be human. We don’t have to do it all, every day. We just need to show up and meet ourselves where we are. I invite you to do this the next time life throughs you a curveball.

In Peace and Love,

Cara

P.S. There is a new moon in Leo on the 28th. It’s a perfect time to set new intentions for fun, creativity, romance and entertainment.